Pieces Of A Woman- An Un-Realised Potential
** Spoiler Alert ** The trailer for Pieces Of A Woman was very promising. Vanessa Kirby is an excellent actress, so is Ellen Burstyn. The topic is significant. Netflix is involved, Martin Scorsese was involved. I was looking forward to watching the movie and write my praises about the film and the cast and crew. […]
Pride Tag
Discrimination drives me crazy. Sometimes it’s towards women, sometimes it’s because of the color of someone’s skin, sometimes it’s about religion, and a lot of times, too many times, it’s about sexual preference. Don’t even get me started about homophobia! I can not understand, for the life of me, why someone thinks he or she […]
Post Conversation About Stillbirth
I took on new roles in my new path; all are very important. But I think one of the essential roles is talking about stillbirth with practitioners from various fields. I begin my talk/lecture/conversation with my own story and talk about the specific characteristics we will see in our clinic, with women who will tell […]
Windows To The Soul
Proper treatment can save lives. (Can I be more dramatic?! I think I could, yes, if I’ll give it more thought, but I think this is dramatic enough so I’ll move on) When do we seek help? Usually, this will happen when we feel our lives aren’t going in the direction we always imagined it […]
I Am Not A Hero
After my stillbirth, at the hospital, I remember the doctors saying I am a hero. When I went back home, my friends told me I am a hero. My brother told me that he sees me in a Wonder Woman suit, saying that I am a hero. I am not a hero. I never felt […]
Departing From Silence To Freedom
Years before I had my stillbirth with Ayelet, I went through sexual trauma. This trauma took over my life primarily through fear. Thanks to successful therapy sessions (which were at times also scary. And challenging. And exhausting. Sometimes it felt like it took me hundreds of years to go through it), I conquered fear and […]
Graves For Babies After Stillbirth
As I was in the delivery room, waiting for my stillbirth to begin, the medical team talked with us about burial. There were two options: a private burial or a mass grave. Ayelet was still inside me, two hours were between me and the horrible announcement that I lost my baby, and already a To-Do […]
The Rollercoaster of Emotions After Stillbirth
Stillbirth is a loss. We go through a real loss, even if society doesn’t always acknowledge our loss, as society never saw our baby. But we felt our babies grow and move inside us, totally present in our lives. Loss is known to everyone. I don’t know one person who hasn’t gone through a significant […]
The Faces and Names of Stillbirth
I went through stillbirth. It is not a source of shame. It doesn’t make me feel uncomfortable. Stillbirth for me is a deep sadness I went through, and I can reconnect to it in a second. I choose not to do so. Instead, I choose to talk about stillbirth. It is the thing that will […]
Thus It Is Mother- After Stillbirth
Prof. Jacob Raz is a well-known author, speaker, and teacher of Buddhism. He wrote a book (in Hebrew), in which I found this, which brought me to tears. The original text talks about a father who seeks comfort with Buddha, but I changed it a little, to mother. I hope Prof. Jacob Raz will forgive […]
Rainbow Pregnancy, Rainbow Baby
The first time I stumbled upon the terms “rainbow pregnancy” and “rainbow baby” was in March 2019, about eight and half years after my stillbirth. I don’t feel very connected to these terms. Here’s why: First, I think that the rainbow is already taken. When I see a rainbow, I think of the LGBTQ community, […]
Talking About Stillbirth
On September 6th, 2010, I was on the 37th week and three days of my second pregnancy. I was feeling under the weather, so I spent most of the day in bed. That afternoon I wasn’t sure I felt my baby move, so I went to the ER. After several attempts to hook up the […]
How Stillbirth Affected My Life
Many women refer to their stillbirth as the “before and after” changing point, the life they had before the stillbirth and the life they have after it is not the same, it’s changed. That’s not the case for me. While it is a significant point in my life, I don’t think I lived my life […]
It’s A Boy- A Short Movie About Stillbirth
On one of my posts someone tagged Limor Barak, a screen writer, who then sent me a trailer to a short movie she was a part of, with a question: “what do you understand from this?” The short movie “It’s A boy” is based on a true story about a pregnant woman, who is about to […]
Pregnancy After Stillbirth
Many women have asked me about the pregnancy that follows a stillbirth. I’ll begin by saying- each woman has her own pace. Each woman has her personal decision to make. It can be a complex decision, it is always a brave one, and the only partners for this decision are, in my opinion, the spouses. […]
Stillbirth And After- The Playlist
Music is an un-separable part of my life. Every experience in my life has a soundtrack of artists I love and respect. First in line are, and forever will be, Queen. Queen is my favourite band since a very young age, their songs are with me throughout my life and are a great source of […]
Stillbirth- Lectures For Practitioners
As I finished writing my story about stillbirth, I felt the next step will be to start talking about this experience. I have a lot to say about it. I didn’t know how one starts booking lectures through. Of course, I need to write one, that’s a given. But how does one actually books lectures […]
Voicemail For Jill- A Conversation With A Song
Conversations with a song. Ever had that? I did, with Amanda Palmer’s heart crushing and soul empowering album “There Will Be No Intermission“, especially with this song, Voicemail For Jill. It’s weird what I’m about to say, I know, but I knew all the songs on this album long before I heard them. Once I […]
And Now What?
The grieving period is over, the tears are dry and they don’t visit as often as before. The pain feels different. Smiling and laughter come easier and more frequently, and suddenly a day goes by without thinking about my baby girl Ayelet. So now what? I think, this is what it means to “move on […]
Why Am I Talking About Stillbirth?
First post on a new blog. What should I write, what should I write. Maybe it’s best to start with an answer to the question- why am I talking about stillbirth. The first simple reason is that I want to. I want to talk about stillbirth because I think it is not talked about enough. […]